Make love, not horcruxes
{ wear }
graham norton during Eurovision 2013: the best of
| graham: | if two girls kissing offends you, then grow up |
| on ireland performance: | good news for the irish economy, i hear they’ve discovered oil there. too bad it’s baby oil and they appear to have used it all on his backing dancers. |
| graham on montenegro: | the picture quality of the moon landing was better than this link to Montenegro |
| montenegro: | we have to be brief, don’t we? |
| graham: | yes |
| graham: | i don’t think bonnie can win now, i don’t know, i’m not carol vorderman. |
| petra: | we're half through voting now |
| graham: | oh that's depressing |
| estonia: | shows up |
| graham: | is he standing outside a prison? |
| albania: | petra you look gorgeous tonight! |
| graham: | better than you |
| albanian guy: | (singing) should i live, should i die without your love-- |
| graham: | you should leave |
| eric: | i'll help you to the bathroom |
| graham: | don't do that eric, that's how rumours start |
| germany: | we're having so much fun!!!1! |
| graham: | speak for yourself |
| dude: | breathes |
| graham: | oh look, it's sideshow bob, nice of him to show up |
| petra: | azerbaijan won 2 years ago, it can still happen now! |
| graham: | god, please, no |
| denmark: | winning |
| graham: | busy right now, just won the eurovision, i'll call back later. #donereallywell!!1!1! |
| voting after denmark has won: | proceeds, ppl giving points to russia or idk |
| graham: | can someone please tell her she can't win now |
| graham: | oh flowers now, marvellous |
| graham: | my taxi is waiting outside so if she could sing as quick as possible, that would be nice |
marry a guy who has sisters because he’s seen the female in her natural state therefore won’t have any unrealistic expectations of you
(via amyourqueen)
reasons u should adopt me as ur pet
- i have soft hair on my head as welll as soft little hairs all over my arms and legs
- i don’t talk much, i am ve ry quiet
- i will let u boop my nose whenever
- i am expert at cuddling
- easy 2 care for, all i need is food and sunshiney spots to sleep in
- please if u don’t take me they’ll put me in a college and make me do the essays
(via captainmischief)
Oh my gosh people, be nice to your waiter/waitress, it’s not their fault that your food is cold or if it’s under cooked. Be nice to the cashiers who are still training and can’t ring up your items as quickly as you want. If a stranger smiles and says hello to you, smile and say hello back! It’s just common courtesy, I don’t understand why people have to be so rude.
This.
(via captainmischief)
